Pastries, Ranked

Dayna Evans · 09/19/14 09:00AM

I only have three teeth: a sweet tooth, a carb tooth, and a fat tooth. I put them to good use by eating pastries at any event where they may be available. Mother's Day brunch? Pastries. Football tailgate? Pastries. Living under a bridge? Pastries.

Prince, Madonna, and Michael Jackson Singles, Ranked

Rich Juzwiak · 09/18/14 09:00AM

Prince, Madonna, and Michael Jackson were born within three months of each other in the middle of 1958. (Kate Bush was also born during this time period.) During the ‘80s, they redefined the way we consume pop music, and the cults they spawned predicted the rabid fandom that we see around most current pop superstars. Ranking their singles together just made sense, as both a critical exercise and an expression of masochism.

Michael Kors' Project Runway Zings, Ranked

Jordan Sargent · 09/17/14 10:45AM

The following zings are taken from the above compilation of Michael Kors' Project Runway zings. If you have your own favorite Michael Kors Project Runway zing please put it in the comments. We welcome all Michael Kors zings.

American Cities, Ranked

Jordan Sargent · 09/17/14 09:00AM

Ah, the good ol' USA. What makes this sprawling nation the world's greatest? Our vast and diverse collection of cities, plus the people that make them go (haha). With that in mind, here is an ordered ranking of America's 50 largest cities.

Kanye West Album Tracks, Ranked

Andy Cush · 09/16/14 09:00AM

A decade ago, Kanye West, this era's most compelling pop musician, released his first album. The conflicted artist presented on The College Dropout—an avowed-Christian backpacker rapping about money, hoes, and rims again—has only grown more complicated in the years since then, and the result is a contradictory, often frustrating body of work. That is to say, an inadvisable subject for ranking.

Worst Places to Bring Your Boyfriend, Ranked

Allie Jones · 09/15/14 09:00AM

I love your boyfriend, he's so great! But sometimes he tags along with you and it'd be better for everyone if he didn't. Here are the worst places to bring him, ranked.

Golden Girls Episodes, Ranked

Bobby Finger · 09/12/14 11:30AM

Thirty years ago Sunday, The Golden Girls, a sitcom following four women in the “golden years” of their lives, premiered on NBC. In honor of its nearly three decades of reruns, I have ranked all its episodes below.

Romantic Comedies, Ranked

Michelle Dean · 09/12/14 09:00AM

Romantic love is a lie told by the heterosexist late-capitalist patriarchy. (For a good book on this, see Laura Kipnis's Against Love: A Polemic.) But lies are more fun to watch while cleaning the house than the truth. Here, then, are 100 well-known romantic comedies, ranked from worst to best.

Safety Schools, Ranked

Sam Biddle · 09/11/14 09:00AM

A "safety school" is a euphemism for an institution of higher learning that's a backup for wealthy high school students who are too dumb to go to Harvard. Here they are, ranked:

90s Black Sitcoms, Ranked

Jason Parham · 09/09/14 09:00AM

The Cosby Show, what has long been considered the greatest black sitcom of all time, celebrates its 30th anniversary in two weeks. That the show’s legendary run is marked by a return to a more diverse television landscape this fall seems fitting: NBC, ABC, and FOX, along with other networks, will debut a variety of shows that cast minority actors in lead roles (several are women of color). This push for more nuanced programming brings to mind the 1990s, a decade known for its rich portrayal of black life through shows like Living Single and Roc. Here, a completely[1] indisputable ranking of black sitcoms that aired between 1990 and 1999.

Drake's Guest Verses, Ranked

Jay Hathaway · 09/05/14 09:00AM

This list omits tracks where Drake only sings the hook. "Drake's Hooks, Ranked" is another list altogether.

90s Hip Hop Brooklyn Anthems, Ranked

Hamilton Nolan · 09/04/14 09:00AM

The 90s were the "Golden Age" of hip hop. Brooklyn is Brooklyn. These are the nine best Brooklyn-themed hip hop tracks of the 90s.

Every Episode of Friends, Ranked

Lacey Donohue · 09/03/14 09:00AM

Twenty years ago this month, Friends—one of the greatest sitcoms ever—debuted on NBC. Today, one of the greatest lists ever—an exhaustive and definitive ranking of every Friends episode—debuts on Gawker. From worst to best, here are all 236 episodes:

The Best Breads for Breakfast Sandwiches, Ranked

Hamilton Nolan · 08/11/14 12:48PM

This list ranks in descending order, from worst to best, the bread products used to make breakfast sandwiches, meaning egg and cheese sandwiches. There is no appeals process.